battle of the junk mail

We all get plenty of junk mail.  I've been thinking a lot recently about the waste of resources and how to put an end to much of it.  The junk mail had been collecting in a pile on the counter for a couple weeks, but when I couldn't stand the stress of anticipating calling all those businesses to ask them to send no more (as suggested here), I tucked it all into the cupboard to deal with later.

Ideally, I'd like to call all the businesses and let them know I'd like to help them save time and money (and paper) by removing me from their mailing list.  Realistically, I am distracted with other tasks.  And I am feeling like the cowardly lion from the Wizard of Oz when it comes to calling strangers to ask them to do something unusual for me.  While I wait for the gumption and energy to call some of the businesses, I have signed up with Direct Mail to be removed from lists.  This is a site that claims to decrease your mail without having to supply your social security number.  I've made one call so far, to the family vet a couple months after my beloved cat passed away (in their office, no less).  The rest of the mail waits patiently.  By admitting my snail's pace at tackling this growing pile of wasted paper, perhaps I will move a bit quicker to tackle it.

This photo makes the pile look much smaller than it seems to me.

no poo shampoo

I heard about No Poo Shampoo a couple months ago from a friend.  And then I heard about it again and again.  I finally found a simple and helpful recipe online for shampoo and conditioner recipes.  Easy.  Clean.  After trying my first home recipes, my hair was mostly happy but quickly drying out.  This recipe keeps my hair happy and soft.  And concocting these recipes in my own kitchen saves so much global energy and waste.

Shampoo:
one tablespoon baking soda per one cup water in a pour bottle, shake before use

Conditioner:
one tablespoon apple cider vinegar per one cup water, shake before use, less vinegar if hair too oily

10/2011 Update: I love this easier cleaner recipe!  I use a little more than one cup of shampoo and conditioner each time I wash my hair.  After swimming days, I soften it all up with a touch of store-purchased conditioner.  My daughter and I love the easy washing and our hair is doing great!

Dear Brother

Dear Brother,

Your childhood was a painful one.  You were hurt.  I was a child myself and we tried to protect each other from the violence (emotional and physical).  You got the brunt of it as the only son.  I wish I could have made things better, but my world was as small as yours.  Shortly after your wedding day you told me I was no more your sister than you were a Mexican ballerina.  I lay on the floor for hours like I'd been punched in the gut.  You had chosen to keep me out of your life and you've maintained that distance for the last decade.  In our years apart, I had emotionally let you go to live your life without me.  I found peace with knowing you didn't want to see me, your only sibling.

Why is it then that you moved three hours away from me and I somehow saw you at a busy tourist port?  You left without seeing me and before I could say hello.  My emotions are once again unsettled and I am searching for a reason to why our paths crossed once again.  You still do not want to communicate with me, this I know for sure.  You know how to find me when you're ready.  Am I supposed to set you free once again?  Do I just let the years tick by without introducing you to your niece and nephew?  Will this space you held in my heart remain open for you?  Do I hope without really hoping?  I suppose so.

What I want to say is this: Look at what I have accomplished in just one generation.  I married a stable, thoughtful, kind man.  We have two healthy children whom we protect and love.  I want you to see what I have accomplished, to see what is possible.  It was hard work getting to this point, but it was so worth it.  My children and I speak of you in our daily dialogue as if you are away on an extended trip.  Regardless of if we should ever speak again, you know I love you.  And in my heart I know you love me too.

With love,
your sister

Luscher Farm

Ladybug Girl Hannah walking to story time with Grandma

We've found an excellent alternative birthday party, free of gifts and full of free time with friends.  Luscher Farm has a wonderful story time each Wednesday in the summer, so we met our friends for stories, the children's garden tour, played a bit, and then took some time for cupcakes.  As with the Ladybug Girl and the Bug Squad book, each child had a chocolate cupcake with their own candle.  We sang and each child took their time blowing their candles.  Some children ate lunch at the farm, some saved lunch for home, and then the children went to work digging, exploring, running, finding edibles, and most of all using their imaginations.  This was such a special way to enjoy a birthday with our friends.  We look forward to spending more time at this awesome farm this fall.

Ladybug Girl and Bumblebee Boy enjoying stories

Liam exploring the farm on his own

friends at the farm

under the bean teepee

time to run free with friends

digging in the sand and dirt with a helpful ant (on left)

the fairy scare crow overlooking the children's garden

balancing and mothering

It is continually amazing to find parenting is so complex.  There are so many things to balance and learn.  I'm always out of something: patience, energy, time, productivity, meal ideas, patience again.  It feels like something is always off kilter or needs adjustment, and I can't quite put my finger on the solution.  My brain comes up with possible solutions, such as getting the kids to sleep before I collapse in exhaustion, going out one evening a week for a date with a friend or by myself, having one hour to myself a week to bathe or write, staying really busy, staying home in pajamas all day, or cuddling more with my babies.  Whatever the challenge, solution, or emotion, there is an ebb and flow to it all like waves licking the sandy beach.  I often take comfort in providing healthy food for my family, spending quality time with my little ones, or talking with other moms about similar feelings and predicaments.  And that is often enough to get me through another day being consumed by my sweet needy children.

Just this morning I had a lovely conversation with two friends about how we are unable to concentrate or speak articulately or remember like we did before our worlds revolved around young children.  It helps to have others around to remind us that we are not alone in the sea of mothering.  It helps to hear that other moms have befriended fairy godmothers and babysitters to spend time with their children so they can get things crossed off their endless lists once in a while.  A mother doesn't have to accomplish everything with children clinging to her legs.  There is hope in hearing a veteran mother share that having young children is the most physically exhausting time of mothering (while the teenage years are the most emotionally exhausting).  Our children will grow quickly and we'll look back and see they were young for such a short time.  These are the days to practice our patience, to love on our children, forgive ourselves for being out of balance, and to let them pull us to the ground for some more cuddles.

homemade liquid laundry detergent

This liquid laundry detergent is simple and can reuse the same laundry detergent container repeatedly, as opposed to purchasing more plastic that has been shipped hundreds of miles.  I love this recipe and use the same amount of soap as with the store-bought soaps, though it needs a good shake before each use.  

Recipe and directions from simplyresourceful:
1 cup hot tap water
1.5 oz grated bar soap
1/4 cup Arm & Hammer Super Washing Soda
2 T 20 Mule Team Borax
essential oils (optional)

Add soap flakes to saucepan with water.  Stir over med-low heat until melted.  Fill a 1 gallon jug half full with hot tap water.  Add melted soap, washing soda, and borax.  Stir well until all powder is dissolved.  Fill bucket to top with more hot water.  Stir, cover, and let sit overnight to thicken.  Shake before each use.  Optionally, add a few drops of essential oil.  Use 1 oz. per load in a front-loading washing machine.

Adapted from www.duggarfamily.com/recipes

vanilla extract with vodka

Today was my first attempt at vanilla extract.  Homemade vanilla extract is simply delicious and I can't wait to have my own to use in the kitchen.  It has taken me about a month to round up the vanilla beans and vodka.  I found a simple recipe that called for two cups of vodka and six (cut-in-half) vanilla beans placed in a glass jar in a dark space for eight weeks.  When it comes to recipes, I need something simple to concoct while balancing the needs of my two young children.  It took me a few minutes to cut the beans in half, add them to the vodka, put it all in the cupboard with a label, and to mark the date on the calendar eight weeks from now.

When the time has arrived to use the vanilla extract, I will fill some small dark glass bottles I have on hand (from all those prenatal vitamins), label them nicely, and share with friends.  The recipe suggests adding a bean to each completed jar, then simply topping off the vodka each time the extract is down to half a jar.  ("I like to put a vanilla bean in each bottle. This way the extract will keep gaining in flavor and you can tell them that by adding a little vodka when it is halfway used up will replenish your supply of vanilla. It will dilute it for a while but it will regain strength quickly.")  This is the gift that keeps on giving.  You may want to mention that you can reuse this jar instead of your friend sending it on to recycling.  You could include a recipe for vanilla also, so your friends can make their own.  This vanilla extract already smells so delicious!

vanilla beans, vodka, and a glass jar

storing in a cool dark place for at least eight weeks